Networking is for suckers
Linkedin today is the cringeworthiest platform I have seen and not even Instagram comes close in cringe. Linkedin right now is what Facebook used to be (FB is a deserted island now). ‘
A thread on professional networking.
A lot of people just go berserk on Linkedin and/or Twitter sending connection requests to people in their industry or in the industry they are trying to break into. On Twitter, it’s more of commenting, DMing, etc., just to get visibility.
When it comes down to networking, almost everyone is forgetting one thing. People always try and contact someone inherently “better” than them in more ways than one, someone in a “better place” in life that they aspire to reach to.
The incentive here for the person reaching out is that acquiring the acquaintance of that person helps them learn better, do better in life, and get to where they want to be, where the person they reached out to is. Here, if the person reached out to responds, there’s a win.
But the win is only for the one reaching out. Even though it is an imaginary situation, many people just hopelessly send connection requests, DMs only to get rejected. There’s always a level of self-interest behind any DM/connect request.
Now, the ones doing the reaching out think just because the person is popular or has a strong social standing/presence, and they reply to some comments, that they will decide to spend their precious time on replying them.
This is the classic scenario just similar to how women/men think about what all they want in their dream man/woman and go after such people. What’s being forgotten here is what is the incentive for the other party.
If you’re reaching out to someone better than you - they will be just like you, either reaching out to someone better than you and trying to network with people higher up in the social strata, or just going about their life after having touched the peaks of what they can do.
What is their incentive to respond to you, talk to you, or reply to you? Nothing. What do they get by responding to you, spending their time? Nothing. If someone like that takes their time to respond to you, it’s out of their altruistic nature. And you can only pay it forward.
That said, here are some things you can do to up your networking game.
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Approach people with what you can do for them, instead of approaching people with only the selfish “what can they do for me”.
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Make yourself useful. Don’t send useless “hi how are you” messages. No point, and no reason to reply to those. People have better things to do rather than spend time replying to you that they are doing great.
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Be precise and concise and be appreciative of the fact that they chose to respond/accept request. Whatever you want to ask - be very specific so that there’s no ambiguity.
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When they do respond, be grateful, and work on developing a relationship. In some fields, seasoned veterans like taking a young underling under their wing and mentoring and passing on whatever they have learnt. One in hundred people do that. If you find that person, be good.
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Most people you send connection requests to are not going to accept it. Most people you send messages to, aren’t gonna respond. If your first thought is “what a dick! not like he’s a big deal. will find someone else!” - know that it’s natural, but definitely not right.
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People today have a sense of entitlement for other people’s time. When you comment and expect a reply or send a message and expect a reply, send a connect request and expect acceptance - you’re entitled. At least know you are and try and act like you aren’t.
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If someone does take you under their wing, and you’re good to them, don’t just keep on taking. It gets exhausting to the givers. Connect, network, and be actively on the lookout for being useful to that person, doing any favor they would need, to repay good karma.
That said, all the networking in the world is inherently for people who are mediocre. Face it at one point or another. If you’re an EXPERT and if you’re damn good at what you do, people seek you out, find you, and come to you. You don’t have to go to them.
You have to network coz you suck. No two ways about it. Inherently, you need that network coz you suck at something. You are also going towards people and people aren’t coming to you - which is also because you suck big time. Sooner you face this fact, the better your life willbe
The only real alternative to networking is getting damn good at what you do that people can’t ignore you. When you get to a stage where you are so damn good at your thing, no matter what it is, the world will take note and the right people will approach you.
If you are a mediocre CS student pursuing his/her MS, even from Georgia Tech/Carnegie Mellon, you’re going to have to apply for interviews. If you’re a top notch expert coder at a young age, immense contributions on github stackoverflow, etc., companies seek you out for a job.
If you’re a mediocre singer on Youtube, you have to network with people, collab, etc., to get more views to your channel. If you are damn good at singing, more like an expert - technically and emotionally, and you are a master in presenting, people will flock your channel.
If you’re an amazing trader, and you have multiplied money and compounded amazingly well in the last few many years, you will continue to do so and eventually smart people find you either to give you their money or to join with you.
To sum up, networking is for pussies (in raw unfiltered language), networking is for those who are mediocre. Strive to become an expert and become one, and the network will come to you. If you’re still mediocre and wanna network, use Twitter & Linkedin wisely.
Respect people’s time and their work. Don’t barrage people’s inbox with messages. Wait until they respond. If they don’t, let it go and move on without any grudge or feeling dejected. If you choose to be average, network smartly. Don’t post stupid things on Linkedin.
Even if you’re not an expert at anything, don’t expose yourself to be an amateur by posting “oh my god, i went to this brilliant master course on scrum and it changed my life. i will be joining XYZ company by April 2020. So psyched!!!!!!! 😍 “
That shit is for FB not Linkedin.
On Twitter, be polite, be respectful - and be specific in DMs. If someone is helpful, don’t take their time for granted. Put in the work and don’t expect handholding with anything. Put in as much work as you can, and then go to people when you hit a wall you can’t cross with
your current mental/emotional/physical faculties. Your time and their time are both precious and it’s important you respect both - learn what it takes to succeed in life and it’s almost always going to be inclusive of the time component.
Don’t chase people on Twitter. Don’t lose your integrity. Don’t be a troll. If you see something you don’t like, stay away. If you troll someone, that’s irreversible and it may come to bite you in the ass. So, don’t do it.
To sum up, networking is for suckers (mediocre people) but most people in society are going to be mediocre only. Try and be less mediocre every day and you ll do great! Chipping away at a rock 1% per day, the rock is bound to break into pieces at one point.